Part I
Yesterday I took the plunge and actually moved Carly into Annie & Mia's room. A Big Deal. Joe set up a crib in there 4-5 months ago in preparation for Alice coming and needing to switch and he even attempted to move her in there once. But I wasn't ready, and she wasn't ready, and the girls weren't ready and it didn't go well and since then Alice has been in the bassinet and Carly is in the nursery with all of Alice's stuff.
Yesterday I was ready. Mostly because I need to get Alice out of our room. She does this thing where she partially wakes & wakes me up. And then I think shes up enough to eat even though she only does this 3 nights a week so I feed her and shes not really awake so she only eats a little and then my day is spent regulating supply that got started at 2am instead of 4am like the other 4 days a week and my body and I can't decide what is normal or right and its really annoying when a good solution might be to just move her to the nursery where I wont hear her and she will fall back asleep and we all live in rhythm (haha!)
Joe put Carly to bed while I read to the girls on the couch where Mia subsequently fell asleep and the day ended on a fairly good note. She did not wake up during the night and scream for her father like she will randomly do (which is one of the thousands of reasons I was hesitant to move her) and this morning I woke up to she and Annie in my room at 6:15. Not ideal but I went with it. Annie says Carly woke her up because she was sucking her paci too loud which is something I foresee Annie possibly getting used to. What I don't know is how she got out... I think Annie got her out of bed but the verdict on Annie's honesty this morning is still out :o)
Which leads me to part II
Once up at 6:15 it was a gloriously sunny and cool morning and I came through a new baby fog as I remembered how much I love morning! I have been caught in this spider web of interrupted sleep and around the clock feedings and grabbing z's wherever possible and older girls who can be sent away with a mumble of "eat a granola bar and watch a movie" to catch 30 (and sometimes 60) more minutes of sleep!
I love morning! I love the air, I love the sky (I love the sky at all hours of the day) I love the stillness, I love the newness, I love the dew (as long as I don't have to walk in it). I don't love parenting and doing things for others but I decided I need to get over that already. I can instill in my girls the love of morning too! Since they CLEARLY are early risers, I can teach them the loveliness and sacredness of the hour! At least Annie and Mia, Carly still acts two no matter the sacredness of the hour. So I decided for the first time ever to stop being Just mom and start being ME mom and for once do something that you love just because you love it!
So I made eggs and handed out muffins and opened the back door and sat at the table and enjoyed the morning Mama Kate style. With every chair pulled out haphazardly (which I hate and would never be if I didn't have oxen living with me Prov 14:4) and crumbs on the crooked tablecloth (ugh! Drives me crazy!) and their coloring books stacked 16in high with baskets of crayons and pencils strewn about on my sideboard (which I long to decorate) And I read my bible and an article on Thanksgiving vs Greed and His providing all that we NEED and I was convicted to keep up the mindset of my purposeful day. Doing what needs to be done and doing it well to achieve the goals that I have for what HE has given me!
Reality is: I can't do whatever I want, whenever I want. There are butts to wipe and babies to rock and laundry to fold and floors to be scrubbed. However, I don't have to be ruled by those things ALWAYS. Yes some things I am ruled by, a dirty butt waits for no man. However I can choose to have the dishes done and table cleaned off before I go to sleep and therefore wake up to an already clean kitchen and enjoy well cooked eggs on a sunny morning. And I prefer farm fresh eggs, so go get em! And I prefer expensive orange juice or lemon in my water. So Buy It! And it calms me and therefor the girls are calm (proverbs 15:1) And I don't need everything the world tells me I need, but life is nice when you are able to express yourself and your personality. Is it necessary? No! (2 Peter 1:3) but it feels good and he wants us to be happy (Ecc 3:13) and I starting thinking about little things that that make me happy that I could be doing, that I want to do as soon as possible or that I want to save up for. Some of them I don't do because they fall off the priority list. Some things I don't do because of my season of life but some things I just don't prioritize and I would like to!
Here are just a few things that I came up with.
Attend estate sales & Auctions just to people watch and treasure hunt
Decorate my house
Get a massage
Bake bread
Pick berries
Meander the farmers market every Saturday morning.
Take a walk
Learn to Embroider
Schedule Date Nights (we are good at date nights but we tend to scramble to find last min babysitters and just wing it and its fun but there are things I want to do that require planning)
Schedule a family photo session
Schedule Girl Time with Best Friend or sisters
Take weekend trips
And now as I type this I plan on adding to this list as I dream :o)
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