Why Do You Keep Coming Back Here?

Only my Mom will truly appreciate this post, and what she will appreciate is that she is not the person who has to put up with this anymore. Joe is lucky I don't allow myself to do this for real and instead make it into a joke and blog about it.

...

 

 



I hate when I reach a point in life when what seems the best action is to lay down on the floor and kick and whine to someone who is willing to listen about all the things you want to POOF disappear or change! Its like the perfect storm (most likely the result of hormones) has erupted and nothing is right. So just to be funny this is my tantrum and you are the person.

My house is a mess

The laundry is NEVER done

My socks have holes in them

I need new underwear, I'm tired of them not fitting right every other day (back to the laundry problem)

I have been eating waaaay too many Christmas treats

I have a headache (see above)

My jeans don't fit (see above)

My brain is overwhelmed

I have no desire to exercise

Im too busy for snuggle baby naptime

I just want to crochet something while watching Christmas in Connecticut darn it!

I wish my coupon to see the Shillito's Elves hadn't expired on Sunday

I want the wood box to be full of dry wood instead of outside dripping wet

I want to like Downton Abbey but I cant get past the first episode

I don't like the gifts we got for the girls this year

Ill stop now

 

yeah. see. theres nothing pretty about that and when you allow yourself to whine it just starts to get out of control.

So instead lets do what I am thankful for.

I got 95% of my Christmas cards mailed today

I have pretty painted toes and a fresh haircut this week and even if my brain was too preoccupied with stupid stuff to enjoy the time without children and with good company to really enjoy it I can still enjoy the result.

I finally have the "go ahead" on a childrens curriculum so I can start planning and I am choosing right now, today, to wait until after Christmas to do so :o)

I enjoy cooking and have a yummy meal planned for tonight

I have the ability to get up right now and tidy my house and jump on the treadmill (hahahahaha) if I wanted to. So lets dig through a basket of clean laundry, find a pair of big girl panties and get over yourself. Look at the big picture. Shut up, ask for help, slow down, stop doing "stuff", and read that last post from just a few short days ago when you had some perspective!

She Knew That

After finishing a wonderful bible study on the book of John last week and knowing I will start a new one in just a few short weeks I decided to spend this time in the book of Luke and just bask in the seasonal appropriateness of the text.
Yesterday while I was reading chapter 1. Enter Annie
"What are you reading?"
Mom: "I'll tell you what I am reading, I am reading about the angel Gabriel. Remember him? He appeared to Mary."
Annie:"yeah"
Mom: "Well He also appeared to another guy named Zechariah and do you know what he told him!?!?"
Annie: "Yeah, that he was going to have a son, and to name him John"
.....
My eyes of course popped out of my head and I screamed and yelled and made a big deal and she just said "yeah I learned about that from my teacher" and ran off to play.

The Me He Wants Me To Be

Seriously having a hard time turning my brain off lately.

 

I have so much on my mind,

big stuff,

 important stuff,

 mundane task stuff,

 reflection stuff,

 restlessness,

 unhappiness,

 contentment,

 God stuff,

 good stuff,

 emotional stuff,

 fun stuff,

 life changing stuff

...

but isn't all stuff life changing?

 

I am feeling the ebb and flow of sanctification right now. I feel growing pains but not bad ones, just pains that I will look back on if I get to be old and gray and see like Polaroid snapshots of times when He changed me more into the likeness of Him and turning me into me.

 

When I think about the younger me I am glad she is gone. She was nice enough but the Polaroid shots just keep getting better and better. Sweeter and deeper and more meaningful as I have aged. A lot has changed over the years, a lot of experiences and regrets that make me do things differently these days. I guess that's just "sanctification baby". I use quotes there because that is my mantra these days.

 

I feel Him prodding me in new ways.

I feel His guidance and I appreciate that I know He is in control.

I feel at rest with where He has me right now which is good. I want to be fully here, I want to be fully present in this time with these little babies because I am looking forward to their future and I want to make sure I invest in their here and now and not miss out on this short time.

 

They are small,

they are needy,

they are selfish,

they are emotional roller coasters,

they are of the flesh just like me

 

Romans 3

 

¹⁰ as it is written:

“None is righteous, no, not one;
¹¹ no one understands;
no one seeks for God.
¹² All have turned aside; together they have become worthless;
no one does good,
not even one.”
¹³ “Their throat is an open grave;
they use their tongues to deceive.”
“The venom of asps (snakes) is under their lips.”
¹⁴ “Their mouth is full of curses and bitterness.”
¹⁵ “Their feet are swift to shed blood;
¹⁶ in their paths are ruin and misery,
¹⁷ and the way of peace they have not known.”
¹⁸ “There is no fear of God before their eyes.”

¹⁹ Now we know that whatever the law says it speaks to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be stopped, and the whole world may be held accountable to God. ²⁰ For by works of the law no human being^[c] will be justified in his sight, since through the law comes knowledge of sin.

 

 

I keep trying to lay down the law so they will keep the law. It is time I teach teach them the law in order that they might know sin and repentance and grace!

 

 

So I will do the daily tasks that He has set before me.

 

I will learn my husband more and grow our relationship deeper.

 

 I will wake up before the sun and change diapers and read books and teach letters and shapes and paint and hide and seek and kiss and hug and snuggle.

 

 I will be a Labor & Delivery nurse and love the people I interact with at the hospital.

 

I will coordinate the children's ministry and the volunteers and love the people that I come into contact with there.

 

I will explore the things I am passionate about and be more purposeful with my time. 

 

And through all of this I will bring glory to Him, preaching His name and giving Him the glory for it all.  

 

 

Thanks for the outlet blog world!